Friday, October 20, 2017

Why Men Will Never Win With Women!

Why Men Will Never Win With Women!

March 10, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

There is a reason why men always lose to women. If you are a man, you might as well accept it and move on because this is a no win situation!

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Warning Labels

Warning Labels

March 5, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

These are actual label instructions on consumer goods for stupid people:

On Sears Hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

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Large Barbie?

Large Barbie?

February 25, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

•Many hamsters only blink one eye at a time.

•In every episode of Seinfeld, there is a Superman somewhere.

•Barbie’s measurements if she were life size: 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall and have a neck twice the length of a normal human’s.

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You Need a License To Hunt Mice!

You Need a License To Hunt Mice!

February 22, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

•Ten percent of the Russian government’s income comes from the sale of vodka.

•On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.

•Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

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Stupid Fact List

Stupid Fact List

February 19, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

•Ten percent of the Russian government’s income comes from the sale of vodka.

•On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.

•Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

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Who, What, Why?

Who, What, Why?

February 19, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

Why does global warming make it so cold out?
Why does the highest setting on the toaster torch the toast, does anyone eat it like that?
If you drove at the speed of light what would happen if you turned your lights on?

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Work or Prison What Should A Person Do?

Work or Prison What Should A Person Do?

February 17, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

What should a person do?
In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8′ X 10′ cell.
At work you spend most of your time in a 6′ X 8′ cubicle.
In prison you get three meals a day.
At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that [...]

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The top 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over.

The top 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over.

February 17, 2010 by · Leave a Comment 

1. Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity searches?
2. Hey, is that a 9mm? That’s nothing compared to this 44 magnum.
3. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off of my lap and got lodged between the brake and the gas pedal, forcing [...]

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